Thursday, August 25, 2011

I Just Feel Like a Failure



Yesterday I wrote a post about ungodly influences and a sweet reader shared this:

"I wish I could go back the beginning of the last school year and crack down on my daughter when she started to take out books like Twilight from the middle school library. Before we knew what was happening, all she was reading was about vampires, werewolves, witches, and other subjects like these. Most of the books in the teen area of the book store are similar. 

I read the Twilight books, because everyone was talking about their daughters reading them, and I wanted to see if they were appropriate. Huge mistake. My daughter saw me reading them, so subconsciously they were on her appropriate reading list. When we talk about appropriate reading materials, she becomes completely unglued, and the conversation rapidly spirals out of control. She thinks she knows what Truth is, but when she started reading these books, her outlook changed.

How do I fix this? She goes behind my back to read inappropriate stuff at school. She sneaks stuff home. And how to stop the conversations going crazy? I just feel like a failure."




Here is my advice...

Maggie, you are not a failure, that is what Satan would like for you to believe (he accuses the brethren). Remember, we are all learning in this great journey of obedience and NONE of us have "arrived". May I suggest the following steps:

1. Pray--You cannot endeavor upon changing the influences on your home without asking help from God. Ask God to give you strength for the battle, wisdom in how to handle your daughter, and perseverance to see it through to the end. Also, to give you spiritual clarity so that your judgment won't be clouded in case you are met with resistance and steadfastness to stand firm.

2. Bible Study--Do a Bible study as a family on what God's Word says about witchcraft, Satan, darkness, etc. and have a family discussion. Talk about how you want to obey Him as a family and that you need to make changes in order to do that. If you have been buying/reading them for entertainment, apologize to you children for not being a godly example and tell them you realized you were wrong (this is why we all need Jesus, point to Him since He is the perfect one and not us) and would like to make things right/repent now.

3. Remove books--Remove books AND other items from your home that do not have a godly influence. Pray and ask God to show you what they are, sometimes He will show you things that you might not even have thought of or reveal things that you did not know about.  You would probably never in a million years allow a witch/vampire to come to your house on a daily basis to teach your children--so don't allow others to do it through literature, movies, TV shows, etc. I shared about how we personally "cleaned house" here.

4. Replace--Now that you have removed ungodly literature, influences, etc. from your home be sure to replace it with good, wholesome and godly influences. If you need help, I suggest you start with my highly recommended booklist for daughters.

If you daughter is sneaking things around then be sure to check her things when she gets home. Remember, that you are the parent and that you are responsible for what comes through your doors. Be vigilant and don't give up, knowing that this is a spiritual battle for the hearts and souls of our children. There are strongholds at work here that we cannot see. Pray for your daughter's eyes to be opened and to have discernment.

Also, perhaps you could even let the teachers to alert you if she is reading any material she shouldn't if she is doing this at school.  I would also try to find out the source of where she is getting the books. Is it from the library? Friends? Bookstore? You will need to keep close tabs on this to make sure it does not happen again.

I would also look into her friendships. Are they the types of friends who would lead her to read these types of books? Into the occult? The Bible warns us "Do not be misled. Bad company corrupts good character." (1 Corinthians 15:33) I would warn these children too, in a very loving way, and let them know that your family is seeking to not read this literature any further. Remember, sometimes it takes one person to make a firm stand for what they believe in for others to follow.

Maggie, I hope this helps. Please know that there is hope for your situation and all is not lost. God loves you and can do a mighty work here and use it all for His glory. He loves you daughter too, even more than you.

Please keep us updated on your situation if possible and know we are praying for you both.


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